Bedridden
2/9/09 - Right now I am virtually bedridden. I get out of breath just going to the potty next to my bed. I can’t even get off the 4 liters of oxygen to go to the rest room. This is very scary. I want my life back.
I usually use 2 liters at night and none during the day and am active. I need to get back to that. I need to stop smoking! I need to live a better life. I will lead a cleaner, better, life so I can be there for my family. I love my children and grandchildren and want to be there for them. How am I going to accomplish this?
2/12/09 - I got out of the hospital last night. I am able to walk with two liters of oxygen but still get out of breath easily, and have to walk very slow. My son came by last night and brought me a DVD entitled You Can Heal Your Live. It is all about making affirmations and believing in yourself and how you feel about yourself.
The first thing is "love" yourself. This concept seems kind of funny me. Not, haha funny but weird funny. We spend our lives loving other people, our mates, our children, our friends but I never thought about loving myself. I mean I know my kids love me. I have friends who care a lot about me and would miss me if I left this plane but I never thought about loving myself.
I am basically a good person, happy to help others who need a hand. I was always a team player, sometimes to my detriment, when I worked in an office, and now in the electronic publishing business. There isn't much I wouldn't do for Margaret, Donna and the other editors on the ePress staff.
I need to get to bed now and get some rest. More on the self healing tomorrow. Tonight I say my affirmations befors I go to sleep.
I love myself
I am a happy, healthy non-smoker
I have a lot to live for
I love myself
I usually use 2 liters at night and none during the day and am active. I need to get back to that. I need to stop smoking! I need to live a better life. I will lead a cleaner, better, life so I can be there for my family. I love my children and grandchildren and want to be there for them. How am I going to accomplish this?
2/12/09 - I got out of the hospital last night. I am able to walk with two liters of oxygen but still get out of breath easily, and have to walk very slow. My son came by last night and brought me a DVD entitled You Can Heal Your Live. It is all about making affirmations and believing in yourself and how you feel about yourself.
The first thing is "love" yourself. This concept seems kind of funny me. Not, haha funny but weird funny. We spend our lives loving other people, our mates, our children, our friends but I never thought about loving myself. I mean I know my kids love me. I have friends who care a lot about me and would miss me if I left this plane but I never thought about loving myself.
I am basically a good person, happy to help others who need a hand. I was always a team player, sometimes to my detriment, when I worked in an office, and now in the electronic publishing business. There isn't much I wouldn't do for Margaret, Donna and the other editors on the ePress staff.
I need to get to bed now and get some rest. More on the self healing tomorrow. Tonight I say my affirmations befors I go to sleep.
I love myself
I am a happy, healthy non-smoker
I have a lot to live for
I love myself
posted by Joan McNulty Pulver @ 11:51 PM
2 Comments:
At 8:44 AM,
Donna Sundblad said…
This is a very touching glimpse into your life, Joan, and one that I think will help others going through a similar situation. Though that doesn't surprise me. You're willing to give to others even when your struggle for breath. What you need to learn, now, is to give to yourself and stop smoking. The reward will be a win win--for those who love you and for those you love.
Donna
At 8:57 AM,
Joan McNulty Pulver said…
It's difficult but I am still smoke free. It is an emotional journey more than a physical one now I think, since it has already been 10 days and most of the physical craving is gone but the "crutch" and the habit (addiction) is still there. I love myself, I want to be healthy, so I will overcome.
Thanks for your thoughts
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